just joined the club: InSoMnIaC

so expain:
forever?
(see also: together but not dating)

"the wall starts breathing.
my minds unweaving.
i think its best you leave me alone."

you know i hate to say this.
i dont want to swoon over you anymore.
i just dont think its there.
theres nothing there. (anymore.)

[edit]
im addicted to sticky situations.
insomnia is beginning to own me.
tape my eyelids up.
its only 11:11 p.m..
dont think sleep.
my eyes wont even begin to shut down till 1.
wanted: imaginary friend.

[edit^2]
2:26 a.m.
tape broken on my eyelids.
awake now without force.
maybe its the sugar in my system.
maybe its all the thoughts screwed up inside me.
either way:
im officially an insomniac.
too bad ill pay for it tomorrow.


yourprincessofbrokenhearts.
theirprincessofriots. [for GC]

remember your words that dark summer night, as you kissed me goodnight? no regrets.

"i love walking into dusty rooms where you can feel the electricity of what will happen that night. or the condensation on the floor afterwards from what just transpired. you cant capture this in a photograph, song, movie, video or review. they all fall short. "

no better words could or will ever be better to describe the feeling of walking into a concert stadium and walking out of one.
the best nights of my life are when i go to concerts of bands who have changed my life.

i feel like im stuck in a repeating role play.

you break me everytime you get near her in front of me.
and you know how much it hurts.


yourprincessofbrokenhearts.
theirprincessofriots. [for GC]

remember how i told you that when you were gone theyd still never leave me?

our dreams are for the dreamakers of unreal ideas we love.
they just simply belong.
it was just a whisper of love and a song line or two.
or maybe they were broken.
nevertheless dont forget the way they make you feel.
theyll never cease to make you feel that way.

i dare you one last time.
look into my eyes and tell me you dont care anymore.
tell me you dont think about me from time to time.

"this aint a scene, its a god damn arms race"

we always did have the same sense of humor.
i was given mine.
did you buy yours on ebay?
it was always so fitting that they were so identical.

and sometimes i regret being more than you bargained for.
you gave my world perfect spice.
the touch of everything i needed.
but in end i was only holding it together as long as i could.
and you still crushed me in one step.

you always did whatever you wanted.
when you had the chance to.
turn away the challenge.
youll lose the next one.

i saw you look me over in my new clandestine hoodie of white.
[give love
then take it away]
now the question lies within your eyes.
were you looking because the words were weapons crushing you with truth.
or was it just that i looked so damn good in it.
you could never resist my smile.
dont pretend you hate me.
you know you never could.
i was just more honest.


yourprincessofbrokenhearts.
theirprincessofriots. [for GC]

"progress report: i am missin you to death"

i stare at you every time we're close and cry inside with wonders of what wouldve been.

i love the sound of acid rain.
until it falls down on me.

too bad we only kiss in my daydream/nightdream sessions now.
i miss the way things almost but never were.

i always wonder what wouldve been?
what couldve been.


yourprincessofbrokenhearts.
theirprincessofriots. {for GC}
&&illalwaysloveyou. {for you, only you know who you are.}

"sinking with the memory of the kiss of eternity"

you cant taste fall but you can taste christmas.
its the way the snow falls and lands when its perfectly perfect which makes me fall in love with an idea that hasnt even been thought of.
and when the sun shines in a way you remember you wish winter was already over.
but not me.
now im pulling apart pictures of old friends wondering when these memories will end.
ive officially come to the strength of saying:
"id rather have a lemon squeezed in my eye then ever smile at you again."
and you dont know what youre missin but if you did youd be missin it.
good music should only be sold to true blue fans.
emo may never be over.
is it becoming a trend?
i didnt know you could become popular from blood running down your rist, blackened eyes, and hurt hearts.
i didnt know you could because you cant.
but its the new fashion to be something youre not so sooner or later popular might be the opposite of you.

theres a melody in dreaming.
we just havent figured it out yet.
curiosity gets the better of us all the time.
why do we hope to dream of something when we have no control?
what places us in wildest dreams of love, hope, and sympathy?

my feelings for you are becoming non-existant.
the way i want it.


[edit]:
i dream in different tongues.
in black and white.
and with love songs.

new song glued to this girl.
the replay button is stuck to my ears.
scream for me if i dont answer.
tune out the world.
let yourself feel better for as long as you can.
this isnt an obsession.
its a passion.
its a love.
my love.


yourprincessofbrokenhearts.
theirprincessofriots. {for GC}

remeber!?

i love the way my little nephew will shove a picture in your face and say "remember...? remember!?"
he says it as a question that seems almost like life or death.
he makes me think that if i dont remember the moment caught in the picture then i'll forever be doomed to eternity in hell.
he makes it sound so sweet like every moment caught on film is something we must always remember or we'll lose all we love and fade away into nothing.

hes 5 years old and most things he says makes more sense to me than what anyone else says.

i fall out of love all the time.
but it takes the right kind of boy to make me fall in it.
and right now i feel dizzy as if im falling in something deep.


yourprincessofbrokenhearts.
theirprincessofriots. {for GC}

lets forget everything.

i remember when fire drills used to be fun.
when break ups didnt hurt.
and when a phone call lasted fo(u)r hours ending in "you hang up first"(s).

if my tears were acid.
my pillow would no longer exist.

i wish i wouldve saftey pinned our hearts and hands together.
when we were together.
it wouldve been much less painful then what you put me through everyday.
standing beside me. -knowing that im not okay.

what would a writer or a poet be,
if they couldnt feel anything?
(nothing).

not being your best friend was killing me.
i couldnt let you go so easily.
and replacing you..
well lets forget everything.


yourprincessofbrokenhearts.
theirprincessofriots. {for GC}